So far...

Here I am... Settling into the cool, crisp weather of Autumn. This has to be my favorite time of year. The leaves changing, the temperature dropping, fresh apples and the smell of cinnamon in the air. I have been working, semi steadily since I last wrote. It's not the greatest paying job but I enjoy it. I am grateful for it. I have also taken up some pagan studies, after experiencing a few rituals with some new friends. For the first time in my life I feel as though I have found something that does feel fake or contrived. I don't feel like this is being forced upon me and again I am happy. As I come to understand the Heathen Beliefs better and more thoroughly, I shall write about them and my findings. The one thing I am trying first is meditation. I feel that if I can get into a "habit" of daily meditation, it will help decrease the stress I experience and may even help me quit smoking, again. We shall see.

The Hunt orig. april 2010

There is nothing like wading through a sea of uncertainty. Putting yourself out there looking for work, looking for a way to provide for yourself. The one thing that helps more than anything else is the group of friends that support  and encourage you. I just want to thank my friends who are there for me in this time of need, without you things would be unbearable.

Everyday that I spend away from my daughters makes me stronger. orig april 2010

I know how hard it is for them to be away. I know how mad they are that I am not with them. I need to get my life right. I need to make myself better for them. These 3 little girls are all going to benefit from this journey. I will be the best father I can. Nothing will ever stop that. Yes there will be speed bumps and roadblocks. That just means I will have to make more decisions, better decisions about where I need to be and how to get there from where I am. The first step I took was 2 weeks ago and it happened in Philadelphia. After hearing my little monkey of a daughter say " Daddy, Please stop smoking. I don't want you to get sick and die." I told her I would do it just for her. Two days later on my bus trip back home I smoked my last cigarette at the Philadelphia Greyhound Terminal. I love my daughters and want to be there for them for as long as they need me.

Another New Beginning Originally posted in April 2010

I have never blogged before... I always found it self-serving and egotistical. But tomorrow I set out on a new journey in my life. It will be a journey through a place I have been before, but the place has changed since I lived there last. I have also changed. I shall be setting out alone. Sure there are good friends where I am going, but I plan on making new decisions with my life. I hope to become a better person. I hope to be happy again. So as I make this trek, I hope to share with you, my findings as I wander through life anew.

Zack

Familiarity...

You may read the following posts to this blog and find them oddly familiar... They should. My last blogger account got hacked so I deleted it. Luckily I saved my very few writings and have decided that I should attempt to pick up where I left off. Please excuse my grammar as my high school days are behind me and I am sure I forgot more than I learned.